7 Things This Lockdown Taught Me

India went into complete lockdown from 25th March 2020 this year owing to the COVID-19 pandemic. All of us were left with no or little heads up to prepare ourselves for what lay before us. The first lockdown that lasted 21 days tested the best of us in the worst of the situations; our work moved into our homes, all household work fell upon us since there was no domestic help and everything that we considered ‘normal’ was suddenly shut. Adding to all of this, the fear of a disease that no one really knew much about. The initial lockdown that was supposed to be 21 days has now gone up to 272 days (as of today) of full or partial lockdown.

Life for most of us changed. For my family, even today, we continue to all our housework ourselves, including cleaning, washing, cooking, and much more. These have been challenging times, making us stretch our physical, mental, and emotional capabilities, in ways we would have never envisaged. I would like to reflect upon a few things (in no particular order) that this lockdown taught me, among many others.

Resilience

Resilience is much spoken about in the corporate world. While we know what it means and how resilient people are, this lockdown truly showed us the extent to which we can extend ourselves for work and domestic chores. Work shifted from office to home and many of us were caught in a situation that was unfamiliar to us; I for one, have a fully functional studio cum office space at home so I was on familiar grounds, in the comfort of a dedicated workspace. The situation allowed me to focus on work and be more productive than I could have imagined I would be given the sudden shift in the work dynamics. I do not, ever, celebrate over-working or working for hours beyond what the role or business demands then, however, the initial phase of the pandemic needed extended working hours, and that was possible with the work-from-home situation. This resilience at work for meeting deliverables despite the initial confusion and shock was a huge lesson learned. Now we have settled into a cadence and adapted to this new work dynamic, as we thrive in what we do. At the same time, domestic chores that take up a huge portion of the day have also become part of what we do every day, and seem ‘normal’ now. Though I hope we get back to the pre-covid times, where the workload (professional and domestic) is kinder.

Fallacy of Time

Considering we were all locked up in the house, working-from-home, with not many options for socializing and going out, we should have had tons of time in our hands. Wrong! This lockdown has taught me that time flew by much faster than it would have in the pre-covid world. The day would begin and end in a flash with so many unfinished chores. My to-do lists for the lockdown period were/are unending. Work time extended and stealthily crept into the personal time, while I was perennially left to wonder ‘where did the time go?’ The domestic chores that we took for granted all this while fell upon us hard, it taught us the amount of time and effort it takes to complete something our domestic help would swish in and out completing in little time (that perhaps is another conversation altogether). While I made elaborate plans about the books I would read and the skills I would add on during this time, I could not accomplish much of it due to the utter lack of time. Work, studies, domestic chores, and family time dominated my days, they still do, leaving not much for any other activities.

Value of Relationships

We spent all of our time (272 x 24 = 6,528 hours, as of date) with our families. This made me realize a few things, 1. How little time we had with them before the lockdown, 2. How lovely it is to see your child grow, 3. work towards getting the 24×7 family dynamics right, and 4. Sometimes it is too much. One of the best things that the lockdown did for me is to give me time to see my son grow up in front of me. As a working mother, I am constantly battling the guilt of not being there for my son as much as I would want to. The silver lining in this lockdown was the opportunity to spend time with him. Being with the family not only allowed us to spend time with the people we were locked down with but to also build more meaningful relationships with them. I admit it was not easy. I struggled with ‘me time’ as there was none, had arguments over conflicting ideologies & menial chores with the spouse and mother, my kid sometimes drew me up the wall with his antics. But to think of it as a boon to be able to be at home as much and see them every day is a much better way to deal with the (negligible) negatives of the whole situation. I missed meeting friends, but talking with them over the phone was great. We had many more touchpoints this lockdown than we would have otherwise as we are all so busy and take even our friends for granted.

Mental Health

This brings me to a very important aspect of our existence, which is often brushed under the carpet. Mental health and well-being during this time were challenging for many. For those who had too much on their plate, for those who had no one to share the lockdown with, for those who are already suffering from a condition, and for those who faced the loss of a dear one and/or livelihood this lockdown. I calmed my anxiety with a variety of tools I use, like physical exercise, music, meditation, reading, or keeping busy with umpteen activities. Being busy keeps the anxiety at bay, but that is something that works for me. Anyone suffering from any form of mental health needs to seek professional help and work a plan/medication that could help with addressing the issue. I learned to take out time for myself when things were overwhelming. I learned to recognize the triggers all the more and worked on keeping away from anything that would trigger an attack. I stopped watching/reading news except for selective articles, watched happy shows, and read happy books (whenever I could steal some time).

Empathy

All of what we went through during this time, has taught me to be kinder to others. I have, honestly, never struggled with empathy. This pandemic has only accentuated the importance of empathy further. I have understood that what we take for granted is not something that everyone has. Everyone does not have the privilege that I have, even as simple as a dedicated workspace at home. Further inspection only opens up the many situations people face that are beyond our realm of imagination, I have learned to be more empathetic to it. I have learned to understand, even if it is beyond reason, what someone may be going through, without judgment.

Patience

As I mentioned earlier, 272 days and counting… As an artist and author, I have ample patience. No work of art or book is made at the snap of a finger, it takes time. This pandemic slowed down the pace of the world, it reeled us in before we could all spin out of control as we chased deadlines/dreams/goals/material gain. It taught us to do things slowly, deliberately, stationed in one place. It taught us that every weekend you need not pack your bags and head out for a weekend vacation. Stay in. Breathe. Enjoy the view from your window. Have those conversations you didn’t have. Watch those movies you couldn’t. Plan. And then execute. You have enough time to plan. Deliberate. Sit back. Be patient. This too shall pass.

Attitude of Gratitude

I cannot say enough times, how full of gratitude I am that this pandemic has been kind to me and my family. We have work, good health, food, and abundance. I cannot even begin to imagine if it were any different. I am thankful that both my husband and I are gainfully employed, although we witnessed people losing their jobs and more. I am thankful to be working with an organization that takes care of its employees, and despite challenging times made sure that we are all paid on time, and more. I am extremely thankful for the good health that my family has, and I pray that we remain safe as we come out of the pandemic, whenever we do. Through this pandemic, I helped those I could, financially. I wish that we all could contribute a little and give back to the community in whatever way we can.

The pandemic is far from over, and there will be many more challenges, more milestones, and many more life lessons. I just hope we all meet on the other side of this pandemic with renewed vigor, positivity, and hope for a safer and better future.